Keeping Up With The Maharshians

Thursday

7:17 a.m.

At last, after yanking my soul out of Jamnagar, where it was enjoying the lovely sights of elephants eating human refreshments and humans behaving like cats and dogs, I set foot in the kingdom of Great Milords (also known as high school). 

This Kingdom is nothing but a mind-boggling collection of bizarre human species.

Allow me to take you on this wonderful journey of barely five minutes, known as The Hallway Walk.

7:18 a.m.

The very first and very least amusing view comes right in front of my face.

The Mundas

These are generally boys that have protein shake as their blood matrix and roam around with silver jewelry. They are not too talented but their bones are well trained to do a good balle balle once in a while. Do I like them? Questionable.

7:20 a.m.

Entering the suffocating classroom air almost makes me want to collapse but it is one of the members from The Kachodas that stops me from doing so. 

The Kachodas

Usually represented by oval-shaped young ladies. They have a watercooler like body structure. Lunch Break? Assembly? Chemistry period? What makes me want to quit decency and give a tight slap to someone? The Kachodas. 

After throwing my bag at the last bench to avoid being killed by zombie laser a Kachoda has, I control my urge to say “Mene twadha chehra nahi vekhna.”

7:40 a.m.

Yay. Answer sheets just got distributed. Guess who is fluttering in the classroom and flexing off their grades? Tun-Tun Maasis.

Tun-Tun Mausis

*Disclaimer: No personal intent of offending any mausi.

Like we slap the “current vala badminton racket” on mosquitos’ faces, Tun-Tun Mausis smack their grades on everyone's. They eat halwa a lot and become the teacher's pet with every moving second. Refurbished versions of Mean Girls. 

Ek chutki ache grades ki keemat tum kya jaano Tun-Tun Mausi.

9:00 a.m.

Who said they were gonna fail Physics, and got depressed, and did not study “anything” for “any” exam but still passed like a Power Ranger? The Pahadis.

The Pahadis

Pahadis are capable of beating Khans and Kapoors at acting. They never participated in school theatrical plays but developed astonishing acting skills. Did Robert Downey Jr. actually deserve an oscar? Nah, I’d rather let the Pahadis have it.

10:15 a.m.

Blessed by one of these AI generated human beings. I present to you The Laukis.

The Laukis

No, it is not Loki from The Avengers. It is literally a bottle gourd. They belong to different kind of Sabjis or as you call it, friend groups. No matter how much salt you add swaad anusar, they are not going to change.

10:30 a.m.

Oh my gawd. Someone wrecks my nerves by yelling ‘Slayyy’ in class. 

 The Girlies

I don’t even wanna decode-

Here’s a picture 

Here are all the organisms I suffer from every five days of the week. I am honoured to give such life-changing information.

Tathastu.